Taking Care of Our Pet

Welcome, Potato!

 

 

 

This week we learned about helping around the house, my favorite! One of the lessons was how to take care of our pets. The girls are extremely knowledgeable on this subject as I am the Founder of a Not-for-profit senior animal rescue Bundles of Love. Each day they help as much as they can. Some days that means feeding, cleaning up their bowls, bathing and brushing. It's not always easy for them as they fall in love with their "pets" and often times they are adopted to another family or we have to let them go to heaven.

 

 

The weekend before we were going to do this lesson, one of our senior cats Jax was diagnosed with GI Lymphoma and we had to say good bye. A few days later, his sister Kitten was adopted and off she went to her new family. That night, Sonia looked at me and asked me, with tears in her eyes, if she could have a pet that was all hers. A pet that wouldn't go to someone else's house or heaven. My heart broke. I promised her we would.

 

 

I am an animal rescuer, so you won't find me in a pet store. I rescue senior animals so I am definitely not going to get a baby. Off I went to good 'ol Facebook and my moms group. I made a quick post about what I was looking for and in less than an hour we had a meet and greet set up. A family who found they didn't have time for their guinea pig was willing to let us have, Potato. We met this 5 year old amazing piggy and scheduled a time that this loving family would drop her off at her home, set up and all!

 

We had a few hours before she arrived, so we hurried home, cleaned a spot and started our lesson. It was perfect timing.

 

 

 

 

Sonia loves the books that come in our Mother Goose Time curriculum because she loves to pretend she is an author. What I didn't know was that she was able to recognize words! From our book, I learned that Sonia can recognize "cat", "love" and a few other words. How amazing! Daniella loves to color and tape the book together. You will often find the girls in their comfy library, reading their books to each other.

 

 

 

 

We have 4 dogs and both girls are a very active part of training them so when we talked about training, they jumped off of the seats, grabbed the cookies and started asking them to "sit", "down" and to "stay". (I couldn't get a picture of this because it's pretty chaotic as you can imagine!)

 

Afterwards, they sat down and colored their bones.

 

 

One of my favorite parts of this curriculum is the opportunity it gives me to watch my children play together. Next up was Build a Bird. They happily rolled the dice, matched the pieces and built their very own bird.

 

 

 

 

We got the call that Potato was on her way so we squealed and then waiting. After she arrived, we went on the Internet and found out what Potato needs to be a happy, healthy pig. Each day we let her exercise for at least 1 hour, we feed her fresh veggies along with her regular food and provide fresh, clean water every day. I clean her cage, with Sonia's supervision, 2x a week and we will be bringing her to see the vet next week for an overall health check.

 

 

 

We love our new pet, we love our old pets and we love Mother Goose Time!

 

 

** Mother Goose Time allows me to follow two of my biggest passions. Educating my children and writing! I am honored to work with Mother Goose Time. I do receive the curriculum in exchange for my blog posts but every word in here is honest and a true example of this curriculum in a multi age home practice. 

Taking Home Schooling On The Road!

Let's Hit The Road Girls ...

well, sort of

This month at Mother Goose Time, we are learning all about our homes and different ways families live. We have explored the traditional house, an apartment, a boat house and then the RV. Well, the girls live in a traditional house, their Godfather lives in Brooklyn so they have been to a city apartment but we had never been on a house boat or an RV. We are still looking for a house boat to explore but I did find the most amazing place for the girls to explore RV living.

I posted on one of my mom groups and was given the name of a lovely RV rental place. The woman reached out to me via Facebook right away and was so incredibly inviting when we went. It was a great experience. She gave the girls bubbles while we waited for her to finish up with a customer. Suzanne showed the girls kindness, respect and love right away!

Her dog, Scarlett, even kept us company.

What I loved the most about this place was how open Suzanne was to allowing my kids the opportunity to just experience an RV. Most rental places are all about their sales and I don't know too many who would be ok with 2 young kids and a homeschooling mom to just look. Oh, how I wish I could afford to rent one for the a night and have the girls sleep in one. But, we will take what we can get.

Ok, so Suzanne let us look at 2 different RV's and so we were able to compare and contrast and get the feel of it.

 

 Sonia was amazed when she saw a toilet on the RV!

As Sonia was sitting on the bed looking out the window she said, "Wow, people really live on a house with wheels?" I mean how much better does life get when you can actually experience the lessons you are learning!

Daniella was all about the couch and the flat screened TV.

We pretended we were eating breakfast at the kitchen table. Of course, Sonia cooked it for us!

Thank you Mother Goose Time and the  RV Rental Place for building yet another amazing childhood memory.

Come check out what the other bloggers are up to: Click Here




** Mother Goose Time allows me to follow two of my biggest passions. Educating my children and writing! I am honored to work with Mother Goose Time. I do receive the curriculum in exchange for my blog posts but every word in here is honest and a true example of this curriculum in a multi age home practice.

Creating Healthy Children Through an Unhealthy Situation - divorce and children and how we can work through the issue not around it

I was scrolling the Internet this morning looking for some inspiration on how to help my children through the tumultuous divorce we are in right now and I found this article. In my opinion, a must read for all parents with children that have chosen to dissolve their marriage. Clear, concise, factual and really puts it into a good perspective.

At present, I am working on how to help my daughter who will be 5 in August through the divorce. I also have a daughter who will be 3 in August.

I need help.

I'm trying to let go of the expectation that my ex will help me with this. He has a lot of emotional issues and didn't want the divorce and finds himself in a place of anger, bitterness and resentment and, at times, it shows up in his actions: not calling the kids, taking a weekend off from his visitations.

Let's be clear here, I too can be angry and bitter. Especially, when I see the unjustness of this situation. When I am left with the upset children because Daddy didn't call. When I have to answer the question over and over, "Is Daddy coming home today?"

I am in the process of working on this and have made myself a promise to work through it, not avoid it. I am seeing progress and I can acknowledge that. However, it is very hard to realize that IF I do fall backwards, there is no one to catch me. I will be met with even more anger and bitterness from him, instead of loving support. But, this is one of the reasons we are divorcing and one of my main issues in life: trying to get emotional support from emotionally unavailable people, trying to feel validated from people that cannot validate me.

For awhile, I kept fighting with him to "man up" "step it up" "don't be that guy" and I realize after another anxiety attack over this, this is pointless. He is who he is and he won't change. He is grieving this loss on his own time and I have to be respectful. So, I will parent alone.

Sometimes, I think some fathers don't realize that parenting isn't just paying money and seeing your kids. Its guiding them, its role modeling, its giving them the coping skills they need to get through life successfully.

What I had to realize is that you can't give what you don't have, so how could I expect my ex to do this?  He is having a hard enough time coping with this situation, it is not fair for me to expect him to be able to help our children. He is simply not able to...yet.

When I would bring all of the these things up to him, sometimes in a nice way but mostly in a nasty way he would accuse me of controlling him, manipulating him, using the kids against him. Let's just say those conversations never went well.

Throughout this journey, I have found it very hard to remain calm and positive when I am exhausted and feeling the world on my shoulders. I am actively working on my communication skills and trying to work on, pausing before speaking and not "coming at him". Sometimes I mess up. I am human.

When I would be accused of manipulating him, controlling him, using the kids against him, I would be sent into a tizzy. I am not! I am trying to protect my girls from a feeling I know all too well. The feeling a little girl or boy gets when Daddy doesn't live in the house and doesn't call. Unwanted. Unloved. Undeserving.

But when I am honest with myself, I can say, in the past, I did manipulate and control him, I no longer do this but I definitely did in our marriage. I am not proud of that. I do not speak to him nicely all of the time, he has a right to have these feelings, too. I get it. I don't like it. But, I get it. But guess what? After we get past our communication issues, we still have a BIG issue. The BIGGEST issue, really. We can argue about our communication all day and how it should've/could've been said better, we can attack each other until the cows come home, but at the end of the day, we need to focus one the issue at hand. Our children!

It's important for us to remember, as adults, we deem some issues and situations "not that big" in our world. But they may very well be THE biggest issues in a young child's world. To a little kid when one parent doesn't live in the home anymore and doesn't call them for a day, their world is shattered. It doesn't matter what the justification is for not calling, what matters is how the kids feel and what we can do to help them. What tools can we give them?

Don't make the mistake that so many parents do and brush off children's emotions because you think its not a big deal.

Listen, empathize and be there for your kids.

So, yes, I will parent alone until their father is ready. I do not believe my ex is failing them but I do believe he is failing to cope with this situation. Ignoring and avoidance doesn't make it better.

What can I do? I can work on accepting his process and continue on with mine and our daughters.

How do I plan on doing this?

Today, we are off to the library to get a ton of books on divorce and loss. I will work through this with them, not for them, because I simply cannot do that. Though, I wish I could.

Oh, how I wish I could just hug them and take their pain and confusion away. Kiss them and melt there anger and sadness away, but this is not reality. We will work THROUGH not AROUND this issue, I will show them the coping skills needed, I will give them unconditional love, I will always be there for them. I will answer the same questions over and over again.

I will not put a mask on this situation. I will not sweep this under the rug. I will not replace it with toys and presents and fun events. I will not pretend we should all be happy all of the time. I will face this with them. In a way that is healing, supportive and loving.

In the end, we will be a healthy family and my girls will know that this was not their fault. They did nothing wrong. They will forgive us, love us and respect us as we will for them.

It doesn't just take two to tango, it takes two to getting a standing ovation for a stellar performance. Right now, I do not have a supportive partner but my kids will never know that. They will know that Daddy loves them, misses them and does the best he can.

When he is ready to parent with me, I invite the help. Lord, knows I need it.

Click here to read the article that inspired this blog!

Letters, Cutting, Numbers..Cha Cha Cha!

Doing the Home School Cha Cha over here!

 

 

We learned the difference between houses and apartments. This was super cool because Sonia's Godfather lives in Brooklyn and she had recently visited the city with him and was able to bring that experience into our lesson. The next time she goes in, she says she will point out all of the apartments!

 

 

Sonia really wants to write and absolutely loves tracing and cutting so this was just a super cool activity for her. She was able to practice her letters....

 

 

 

Identify the letters apartments by matching the code with the color and the floor number...

 



 And was able to practice her cutting by cutting out all of the game pieces...

 

 

This lesson was chock full of learning concepts. Wow, and she had a blast! Now, that's effective learning.

 

Thank you Mother Goose Time.

Come check out what the other bloggers are up to: Click Here




** Mother Goose Time allows me to follow two of my biggest passions. Educating my children and writing! I am honored to work with Mother Goose Time. I do receive the curriculum in exchange for my blog posts but every word in here is honest and a true example of this curriculum in a multi age home practice.



Using Mother Goose Time in a Multi - Age Household

Can we build it, YES WE CAN! 

We kicked off June with such a wonderful theme and equally amazing lessons and art. I chose to feature the House Painting activity in this blog because I wanted to show how Mother Goose Time can be used on a basic preschool level up to a more advanced Kindergarten level. While Daniella, chose to use this experience to finger paint, talk about colors and feel the activity, Sonia took it much further. For this family, we focus on the process, not the product.

I did this activity separately with both girls because I knew, together, would not be a good idea. Sonia's creativity would be stifled by Daniella's rambunctious sensory play. I didn't want to take away from either child's experience. So how did I separate them? While Daniella napped, Sonia created. While Sonia flipped through Goldilocks, Daniella played!

You will notice that there are hardly any pictures of Daniella's activity and that is simply because I could not hold the phone and clean up paint splatters at the same time nor did I want to take away from her experience by being distracted by getting the right shot. With Daniella, its very hand over hand and creating together, so I really choose to just be present when working with her independently. Here's the one and only.

Sonia is more independent and gets "lost" in her work. She prefers I do not help and doesn't even notice I'm taking pictures. Occasionally, she will look up and say "Cheese" and I snap that shot. But mostly it is candid photos of her at work.

I had read that some of the other bloggers were having trouble with the corners curling on their houses after they dried, so I put the house on a background piece of tough construction paper to prevent this. This also gave Sonia the opportunity to see a bigger picture. She painted clouds as well.

She wanted to really build her house so we took out our construction paper and scissors and she began to pick her paper for the roof, windows and door. She cut everything by herself. Planned all by herself. She told me what paint colors to put down and went straight to work.

She utilized the brush that came with the curriculum and this sparked a great conversation about texture.

After, her masterpiece was done, I asked her if she wanted to write numbers. She did and I think for a 4.5 year old, they are beautiful.

After the article and now every morning in circle time, because of this project, we are reviewing her address and phone number.

Thank you Mother Goose Time.

Come check out what the other bloggers are up to: Click Here




** Mother Goose Time allows me to follow two of my biggest passions. Educating my children and writing! I am honored to work with Mother Goose Time. I do receive the curriculum in exchange for my blog posts but every word in here is honest and a true example of this curriculum in a multi age home practice.

Don't Say These Things To A Divorcing Mom...Ever!

**Disclaimer: This article is not meant to shame, hurt or offend anybody who may have had these statements, or any variation of them, come out of their mouths. It is not meant to make light of a very serious situation. This is purely meant for entertainment. Deal with it.

As a recently divorcing woman with two young children, I have been met with some of the most annoying comments by innocent people who, I know, are simply trying to help me. For some people, they simply do not know what to say during a hard time for another so they say anything. I mean ANYTHING.

I want to help you out and give you some guidelines of inappropriate options. Feel free to disregard all of my suggestions and continue on, but at least you will now be informed. That’s all I can do.  

Don’t say I didn’t warn ya!

Never say any of the following. If you have said this one time or another, don’t feel bad. It was probably innocent. But. Just. Don’t. Do. It. Again.

No, really don’t.

1)      “I’m so sorry”

       Sorry for what? I didn’t wake up one day and say, “oh hey, today seems like the greatest day to divorce my husband and father of my children.” If a couple is getting divorced, they likely have had serious issues going on behind closed doors and separation is the best idea. There is nothing to be sorry about. In fact, I feel sorry. I feel sorry that there are so many couples who remain unhappily married.

No really. What are you sorry for? I have asked people this question, and in response, most of the time, I get, “I’m sorry that you are going through this.” Going through what? A hard time that will eventually end up better for everyone involved. Well, I’m not sorry. So, please don’t be sorry for me.

2)      “Have you tried counseling?”

       Nope. I just thought, let me make the most devastating life changing decision on a whim. In my case, yes we tried counseling but when the root of the issue is that a couple is irreparable, ain’t no counselor in the world gonna fix that! I chose to end the marriage, and in my opinion, that’s enough. Why do I have to back my decision up with supporting evidence that we tried to make it work?  

3)      “All couples have problems.”

       Really? NO! Say it ain’t so! I got it. I know that. But I made the choice to end mine and deal with the consequences. Some choose to stay and work it out. End of story. How is this helpful again?

4)      “How are you going to be able to handle the finances?”

       How is this any of your business? It would be rude for me to ask your salary and your husbands salary and ask how your family handles your bills, right? So why is it not rude for you to ask me this? Here’s how… I’m going to handle it just like I handle everything. One day at a time.

5)      “Are the kids going to be ok?”

      Probably not. They will probably end up prostitutes and gang bangers because of a decision that will ultimately create a non-toxic, healthy living environment for them. Duh! Yes, they are going to be ok. Marriages should not remain because of the kids. A marriage is between two consenting adults who choose to spend the rest of their lives with another person. Parenting is between two adults that have chosen to create another life. Two separate issues. Just because I am ending my marriage, does not mean my parenting contract is up. The kids will be fine. Hell, they might even be happier! It’s an adjustment for everyone but everything will be fine. It always is.

Now, here's what you should say.  

“Wow, rough road ahead. You will be fine. If you need anything, just let me know.”

End of story. Done. No more. No less.

The important thing to remember, is when that person reaches out to you. Stay quiet. No advice. No judgment. Nothing. If they ask for help and you can help them, then help them. Please remember it is important to help them the way that they have asked to be helped. Not the way you think would be helpful. Just listen to them. Do what they ask.

You will probably hear the same story over and over and over. You will be met with many different sides of this person. One minute, they are fine, ready to take this head on. The next, they want to crawl in a ball and give up. In the next conversation, they may be laughing, crying, angry, confused. Your job. Do NOTHING. Just let them ride the roller coaster with a friend who is ready for anything and who will just be there.

When the reality and the truth finally came out that my marriage was over and I had filed for divorced, I didn’t know who I could talk to. Of course, I went straight for my already divorced friends. I avoided the happy newlyweds like the plague. I avoided people in general sometimes. None of that made me really feel better, but it helped me deal a little until I was ready for more.

Support can come from the strangest of places. I shared with a co-worker that I was divorcing. What she did was life changing. She had been through a divorce as well and gave zero advice.  She simply identified her feelings that she had experienced when she was going through her divorce. Voila! The situations were entirely different, but the feelings were exactly the same. A person I never thought would “get it” GOT IT! My lesson, don’t avoid people. You never know who can help.

That conversation, sparked me to find other single moms. Not that I didn’t want to hang out with my married moms, but I couldn’t take anymore looks of pity or the avoidance of telling me that they were getting ready to sit down as a family to eat. Yes, that happened. As if because I’m divorced now, my family is ruined and we don’t sit down to eat. We just heat up our microwave dinners silently and eat in between tears now. Ha!

But where do I find these women? I’m not about the dramatic Facebook groups that whine about being a single parent. That complain about their exes all the time. That spewed unhealthy advice. In fact, I left most Facebook groups that had any amount of drama. I found myself dipping my big toe in the murky waters of the whiny pond. That certainly didn’t help.  

I want to be surrounded by empowered single moms. Moms that took this situation and made something of themselves and their kids. I found MomCo.

Yes, they really did have “an app for that.” I’m not kidding you though, it really helped me.

Although, this app has helped me find other moms in my area that is not what changed my view of this app. Playdates are great, forums are wonderful, reading articles from other mom bloggers are therapeutic. But, that’s not what helped me the most.

It was when one of the creators of this app and I had a personal conversation. She shared that she had been through this. That she is a single mom. She let me share how I was feeling. She did everything the way it was most helpful for me. Which wasn’t much. She was just there. She encouraged me to power on. Her words were helpful but her actions were more powerful.

This app is created by one hell of a woman that took her situation and turned it around to help, inspire and empower other moms. Not just divorced, single moms. Moms in general. Because, in the end, a mom is a mom is a mom. We don’t need relationship labels, we need support from each other.

It is because of this strangers openness to be there for me and allow me to vent that changed my view of this app. It is what this app symbolizes to me now. It is seeing the product of hard work and passion and knowing that if you follow your heart and stay strong you will always create a better situation. This app, this creator, this mom will forever be a part of my journey in the most positive way possible.

There are so many moms on there ready and willing to be there for you. Who knows who you can help in return. Check it out. You may find your inspiration there! I know I did.

Please, take this article, as a light way of dealing with a heavy situation. I hope I am able to, if nothing else, make some moms giggle their way through a tough decision.

I am no guru. I am no expert. I am just a human who now has some more life experience to add to my resume.